rude questions about adoption

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Charly
Posts: 21
Joined: Mon Jul 11, 2016 9:28 am

Re: rude questions about adoption

Postby Charly » Mon Jul 11, 2016 11:12 am

We are free to choose with whom to communicate and what information to discuss. It is so true, that sometimes we meet people which are not as reliable as it seems on the first sight. Of course we should think first and then talk. But it is not less important to remember that we should believe in people, in their fairness and honesty.

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Tomy
Posts: 25
Joined: Tue Jul 12, 2016 10:53 am

Re: rude questions about adoption

Postby Tomy » Tue Jul 12, 2016 1:18 pm

I try to have good relationships with all acquaintances and to be as polite with them as possible. At the same time my acquaintances usually are polite with me so they don’t ask about my private life too much. Of course I am open to discuss any question about my life with my close friends and I know that I can be sure about them.

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franky
Posts: 53
Joined: Fri Jul 08, 2016 9:52 am

Re: rude questions about adoption

Postby franky » Wed Jul 13, 2016 1:28 pm

adoption deserve more attention. I have failed mu process of adoption, so I cannot give any piece of advice. All I can do is to tell you my story. My boyfriend and I have found an agency for adoption program and start the process. After two years of delayed meetings and unreasonable reasons for refusals this agency apologized and said that they couldn’t do anything more to help us. After some time we have discovered that this agency doesn’t exist anymore. It was the biggest disappointment of my life.
I just hope you guys will never met such agencies in your life.

Andreas_Maroon
Posts: 569
Joined: Wed Jul 13, 2016 8:41 am
Location: Rome, Italy

Re: rude questions about adoption

Postby Andreas_Maroon » Thu Jul 14, 2016 7:09 am

It never occurred to me that there can be some rude questions about adoption... Can anyone give some examples? Adoption is a thing of a big generosity and kindness - in most cases - so I cannot imagine any "confusing" things about adoption that can be uncovered by any kind of questions asked. Though in the case of LGBT marriage that may occur - but in that case the question is more about your orientation, not the adoption itself. I am lucky to live among people, who are ok with adoption among LGBT marriages. that is due to fact that there are some really good examples of how good gay parents can be. So - any examples of those rude questions, anyone?)

Paul_O
Posts: 490
Joined: Fri Jul 15, 2016 7:39 pm

Re: rude questions about adoption

Postby Paul_O » Mon Jul 18, 2016 7:47 pm

One gay couple that I know - recently had a really unpleasant discussion with some people. They adopted a girl three years ago - and though they live in Glasgow - even there they bumped onto intolerance among locals. they were on the football match with their daughter - and one old couple started the argue with them, when they figured out that it is their kid - and that they are a couple. They told me that there were usual questions , sort of "What do you think you will teach your daughter " and "what right did you have to adopt the child". One of that gay couple asked if those old fellows had kids of their own. And it figured out that they did not. what I am saying - is that rude questions usually are being asked by the people who have no happiness in family life of their own.

V_Vegas
Posts: 607
Joined: Tue Jul 19, 2016 10:20 am

Re: rude questions about adoption

Postby V_Vegas » Wed Jul 20, 2016 1:18 pm

I think I wrote about this on some other forum... I have friends - a gay couple from Barcelona. They have an adopted girl - 6 years old already. So they did tell me that some people are scowling suspiciously on them. they told me that only one they had silly questions about "being gays and having a kid", and that happened while they were travelling across Europe - when they were in Ukraine, I think.. Never did that happen in Barcelona or any other western European city. Only ignorant people can ask such questions. These people usually do not even want to hear the answer to that questions - their only goal is to make you feel embarrassed.

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Robb
Posts: 141
Joined: Wed Jun 22, 2016 3:12 pm

Re: rude questions about adoption

Postby Robb » Wed Jul 20, 2016 5:56 pm

i think that it is really better not to tell the other people abut your adoption. normal people would never react negatively, or even if they think something bad it does not mean that they have to tell all their thoughts to you. as you understand not all people are normal, and there are those who want all people to know their opinions. it is better to keep it in a secret and do not worry that someone may tell you something rude. you know that you have done everything right and do not worry about what other people think.

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Mike
Posts: 41
Joined: Wed Jul 20, 2016 10:22 am

Re: rude questions about adoption

Postby Mike » Thu Jul 21, 2016 1:07 pm

I agree with Robb. First of all you should be sure that you do everything right. It doesn't matter what other people think about you. Usually they just don’t care, because they have their lives full of problems and events. But if they talk about you it only means that their life is really boring and not worth talking about.

Matthey
Posts: 55
Joined: Thu Jul 21, 2016 2:51 pm

Re: rude questions about adoption

Postby Matthey » Fri Jul 22, 2016 12:48 pm

For all my life I have heard so many rude questions and opinions about my life, that I think even my immune system works to block them from the first second. I am tired of all this lectures about the life and how I should live it. I avoid any conversations with people who are not my close friends. They will not understand me anyway. Why are they so sure that they now what is better for me? I don't tell them how to live and I expect the same respect to my life style.

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Easton
Posts: 258
Joined: Mon Aug 08, 2016 1:38 pm

Re: rude questions about adoption

Postby Easton » Mon Aug 15, 2016 5:03 pm

i know that a lot of people in most cases are really very interested in other people's lives and they often give a lot of questions. and in some cases these questions are really very rude. they do not accept us and they do not want to understand that we are the same as they are and we also want normal life with children and everything like that. they often judge us that we adopt children because we can not give them anything good.but i do not believe in it and i think that you have to avoid all the questions if you consider them being rude. you do not have to answer them. just keep calm and do not pay attentions to such people.


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