a man of your dreams has kids

Andreas_Maroon
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Location: Rome, Italy

Re: a man of your dreams has kids

Postby Andreas_Maroon » Fri Sep 23, 2016 5:36 am

Paul_O wrote:Creatures you say.

Yep.. another "creature lover". I wonder if this guy does have kids himself) Though perhaps this is just the way of saying that kids are cute.. But if I would see the guy is saying that all the time - I would think twice before getting into relations with him) Speaking about this topic - I know a straight couple, where the husband married his wife, when she already had a teenager kid. And they made a really good family, the kid took him as his father easily. Though I suppose not all the stories do end that well. this would not be a problem for me actually. Though I confess that I would really want to have the kids of my own - I mean - biologically.

V_Vegas
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Re: a man of your dreams has kids

Postby V_Vegas » Sat Sep 24, 2016 10:28 pm

i would be the happiest man in the world, if my partner would have the kid already! Though - he does not. And that does deprive me of the ability to see, if I would be really that glad in reality - as well as I am in my consumptions) Speaking about the wish to be the biological father - i was thinking about that, and, honestly, I do not feel any super strong urge to be the biodad. We did not discus this matter with my partner yet - but I think that when it is going to come to having kids - i am going to allow him to give the seed for this, if this is going to be that important to him.I am sure that he is going to appreciate that gesture )

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Jim
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Re: a man of your dreams has kids

Postby Jim » Sun Sep 25, 2016 12:42 pm

I can not understand how people can hate children and how the last can complicate something :o :shock: :? Kids are so cute and the most wonderful creatures in the world. Personally I love them very much :P :) So, that is why, if I loved a man of my dreams, who had kids, I would certainly date him. So I advise you to try dating him at least to understand that children are awsome.

Fatherbest
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Re: a man of your dreams has kids

Postby Fatherbest » Tue Sep 27, 2016 6:57 pm

Take a deep breath and make sure you can handle this kind of relationship. Being with a man with children is never an easy thing and it isn't for the faint of heart.
Don't feel bad if you can't deal with the division of attention. Consider it self-preservation. Take some time alone to make sure this is what you want.Talk to your man. Sometimes discussing how you are feeling will not only make you feel better, but it will let him know how you are feeling. Granted, you can't whine about every little thing, but repression is bad. Do your best if you really want to be with that man

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Harry
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Re: a man of your dreams has kids

Postby Harry » Tue Sep 27, 2016 7:01 pm

i do not think that it is really a reason for it. if he has kids but does not live witр them then i think that you shall not have any reasons to worry about it. i am sure that everything would be alright.yes he would spend with them some time, spend some money for them but i do not think that it shall worry you much, it is his business, but not yours. but if he wants his children live with you then i think that it may be really a big problem for your relations and i do not even know what i would do in this situation. of course you may ty to do it , maybe his children would like you, but in most cases it is much different.

Ben_Roar
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Re: a man of your dreams has kids

Postby Ben_Roar » Thu Sep 29, 2016 8:21 pm

Harry wrote:maybe his children would like you,

And may be not) I think it depends a lot on the age of the kids. It would be a terribly bad idea to try to search for the common language with the teenager, for example - they do take all the family quarrels and issues really close to their hearts. If we are speaking about the baby - then this is a really good situation for you - because baby will not really care about who you are, when you are treating it well. I think that if I would get in the situation like this with my husband - I would not mind.. Though I would want the second kid for sure - and that would be the main question in this case.

Ken1
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Re: a man of your dreams has kids

Postby Ken1 » Mon Oct 03, 2016 5:18 pm

Sit down with the kids. Tell them that you are really nervous about meeting them, because you really love their father. But - most importantly - you don't ever want to give them the impression that you are there to replace their first father. Emphatically state that you know you could never take that place, but you will always be there if they need support. Tell them you don't want to change anything about the way they've been running their lives, their family traditions, or their relationship with either their father . Tell them that you may need some help learning those traditions. Finish up by telling them that you're really looking forward to getting to know them better and be open to questions.

Andreas_Maroon
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Location: Rome, Italy

Re: a man of your dreams has kids

Postby Andreas_Maroon » Tue Oct 04, 2016 5:33 am

Ben_Roar wrote:And may be not)

It was always interesting for me - how should the couple act in the situation, when one of therm do have the kids - and this kid does not like the partner of his parent? Is there any way out from this situation - or does this lead to the breakup despite all the efforts? I think there must be the way to convince the kid somehow, or to "buy" his attitude. when you are a single parent - that does put you in a pretty difficult situation. On the one hand - you are still young and you have certain needs.. to have a partner, to be loved. But on the other hand you do have your commitments for the kid.

Paul_O
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Re: a man of your dreams has kids

Postby Paul_O » Tue Oct 04, 2016 7:25 pm

Andreas_Maroon wrote:this kid does not like the partner of his parent?

The first thing that comes to my mind - is that they have to break up the relations. Though I do think that you are right - that kid can be convinced in some time. I think I would act the following way in this case. I would meet my kid with this guy - and introduced him as a friend of mine. they would have friendship with my kid as well. In some time the kid would use to this person. And after some time I would tell that he is going to live with us, perhaps even that we are in love - that does depend on the age of the kid. So - a bit by bit, step by step - I would introduce an new person to our family.

Pete28
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Re: a man of your dreams has kids

Postby Pete28 » Sat Oct 08, 2016 8:32 pm

So I think that its very difficult situation, and you have to take difficult decission. So anyway - you need some time, to think - if it is worth of it, if you can accept them and if they can accept you, because children for every normal man are on the first place. So its your choice...


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