if your child is lying

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Mark007
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if your child is lying

Postby Mark007 » Mon Jul 04, 2016 7:25 pm

Noticing a pattern of lying in your child can be a frustrating and frightening experience. You wonder if your parenting has caused your child to develop this unhealthy behavior. You secretly worry if your child will become an adult pathological liar. Rest assured, lying is a common and normal part of childhood development. Still, there are strategies you can apply to keep the lying at bay. But also we should recognize that lying is a healthy and essential part of cognitive development. If your child lies, it is not necessarily your fault. By applying these skills, you may find that your child's lying fades with time. Are you aagree with me?

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DaddyAdam
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Re: if your child is lying

Postby DaddyAdam » Tue Jul 05, 2016 9:40 am

Another thing - accept that lying is a modifiable behavior. Catching your child in a lie does not mean he is bound to be a sociopath. Lying is just one of many ways children explore the world and the reactions/expectations of others. Lying is learned through trial and error.For example, Matty told a lie that kept him from getting into trouble, so he learns that lying could protect him. His not getting into trouble reinforced the likelihood that he will get into trouble. However, anything learned can also be unlearned. Lying is no different.Reinforcement goes both ways. Matty's lying was reinforced because he avoided trouble. On the contrary, a child telling the truth but still getting into trouble can actually be reinforced to lie in the future.

alex32
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Joined: Mon Jul 04, 2016 2:07 pm

Re: if your child is lying

Postby alex32 » Tue Jul 05, 2016 10:38 am

Well...we need to define what kind of lies this is: a white lie or deliberate constant lie. In the case with the "white lie" we must find out what was the cause of it and what what motives he chased. Afterall, maybe he wanted to protect somebody or avoid some kind of danger. There are no excuses for him and you must be sure that it happened once and would never repeats again. Talking about "delibarate constant lie" parents can face serious problems. If the child lies about everything constantly and not going to stop...well...it may have consequences. In such a case i would recommend to ask for a professional help and try to eliminate the problem.

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Richard Hawley
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Re: if your child is lying

Postby Richard Hawley » Tue Jul 05, 2016 11:22 am

Praise truth-telling. How you respond to lying in the moment often determines whether your child will keep up the behavior. While you shouldn't overlook episodes of lying, try to avoid demonstrating anger or frustration with your young child. Doing so may inadvertently cause the behavior to continue. Instead, focus more on situations when you notice your child being truthful. ighlight the positives associated with being honest and congratulate your child on her honesty.Use words like "awesome", "excellent", or "great job" when praising your child for telling the truth. Always be clear about what you are praising your child for so that she knows which behaviors result in positive consequences.

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Albert
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Re: if your child is lying

Postby Albert » Tue Jul 05, 2016 1:38 pm

Point out the differences between "play-time" and "real life". In some situations, your toddler or younger child may lie as an extension of their make-believe worlds. Children play all sorts of games, read stories, and watch TV shows that portray outstanding and remarkable circumstances. Being immersed in this make-believe world can cause your child to have a blurred understanding of reality.Talk to your child about the differences between made-up stories and the truth. Clearly identify times when it is okay for your child to engage in imaginative storytelling and times when he or she must not. Be careful not to diminish the significance of imaginative play, as it is essential for creative and cognitive development.

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Peter Parker
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Re: if your child is lying

Postby Peter Parker » Wed Jul 06, 2016 8:04 am

Teach the importance of honesty through stories. Use stories as a way to reinforce the benefits of being truthful. Most children's stories have a moral that can be discussed. Use your child's reading time to outline the significance of telling the truth by pointing out the consequences in different characters' lives for either lying or being honest and doing the right thing.Examine the rationale behind lying at this age. In the middle years of childhood, kids lie to protect themselves (or a friend or sibling) from getting into trouble or to prevent you from being angry or disappointed. Kids want everyone to be calm and happy (including themselves), and, if lying suits this purpose, then they'll do it.

Argo
Posts: 150
Joined: Tue Jul 05, 2016 6:11 am

Re: if your child is lying

Postby Argo » Wed Jul 06, 2016 1:23 pm

There are no completely honest people, everybody lies from time to time. However, most parents want their children to be cleverer, better and more honest than they are. One of the most widespread causes of children's lying is fear. They are afraid to disappoint or upset their parents, be blamed or punished. Sometimes children can lie because they are afraid of their parents. In this case parents are partially to blame, because too severe punishments, insufficient support, strict requirements can lead to child lies. When this occurs, don't try to wean your child from lying. You should try to build trust with your child and let them know that you love them despite everything. If your children stop feeling fear, they won't need to lie.

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Steven Tyler
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Re: if your child is lying

Postby Steven Tyler » Wed Jul 06, 2016 7:13 pm

Refrain from labeling your child as a "liar". One of the worst things you can do as a parent is label a child by an offensive behavior. It is the behavior (i.e. lying) that you do not like, but labeling can make it seem as if the child is the problem. Even if you have noticed a consistent pattern of lying in your child, avoid saying the "L" word.Instead, exercise the belief that your child can be honest. Kids should know that you have confidence in their truth-telling abilities, and that you see them as brave or courageous when they are honest - even when telling the truth is scary or hard.

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Jimmy
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Re: if your child is lying

Postby Jimmy » Wed Jul 06, 2016 7:44 pm

People, a child is lying because he or she is afraid of your possible reaction. Maybe you have said something that gave a child a reason to be afraid of your words! I have a friend and his father always told him not to claim the trees or he will punish him! Once he fell down from the tree, but said (showing a big shiner) that I attacked him! And why did he lie? Because he was afraid of his father's reaction! BE KIND WITH YOUR CHILD!!!

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Adam Levine
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Re: if your child is lying

Postby Adam Levine » Fri Jul 08, 2016 1:52 pm

Like Doctor House says all people lie. Not a big deal. The other thing is why do they lie and how should you behave in such situations. Well sure if you are sure that the child lies. Child lies because we lie. Sometimes we tell lies to our children. So do not be surprised then. Don't walk your child into a lie. Sometimes, adults make the error of putting children into tight situations in which they are tempted to lie. I mean sometimes we are the reason children lie. SO first of all we should stat looking at ourselves. Then we can damand something from our children...I think it is fair


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